Conspiracy theories...

I don't fall for every conspiracy theory out there - for instance, I'm pretty confident that Oswald acted alone.

But when it comes to the disappearance of famed aviator Steve Fossett, consider me the leader of the tinfoil-hat crowd. He's been missing since Monday without a trace. His emergency beacon (set to become active after a crash) hasn't been detected, and nobody has heard from him despite having had aviation radios and a cell phone at the time of his fateful flight.

Here's my theory: He went out looking for dry lakebeds for his land-speed record attempt, as widely reported. But then he ventured a little too far to the south and got too close to the Nellis Air Force range, home of mysterious Area 51.

I'm not saying he was abducted by aliens or anything, but I'm sure that any unauthorized aircraft venturing too close to this area would be forced out of the air, either by military aircraft or more lethal means. This theory has been dismissed out-of-hand by several of the spokespeople for the search effort. But the restricted military range extends to within 130 miles of the Flying M Ranch, from where he took off. That's about an hour's flight in his Bellanca Super Decathlon.

If he did venture too close for the military's comfort, they probably forced his plane out of the sky - either getting him to land at the base, or more ominously, shot him down. Either way, the military could be biding its time and trying to figure out how to handle this major PR faux pas. Maybe they'll never reveal anything and just wait for the Civilian Air Patrol search to be called off...

(You heard it here first!)