Friday, September 28, 2007

The frustration of the unknown

Steve Fossett and his Bellanca airplane have now been missing for over three weeks. Although the story has fallen out of the media's spotlight, a significant number of folks remain either interested in, or consumed by, the ongoing search.

It's amazing how quickly we've all become accustomed to the information age. The are no unanswerable questions anymore. Anything worth pondering can be explained with either a few clicks or by applying technology to new research.

Wonder what's the name of the flower that suddenly sprung up in the backyard? A couple of minutes searching Google and you should have your answer. Wonder what the surface of Mars looks like? Let's launch a rover and find out. Who was the MVP of the 1957 World Series? It took me about ten seconds to discover that it was Lew Burdette.

This is all in stark contrast to the vast majority of human history. If your uncle was a Roman ship's captain and went missing, you'd probably never learn what really happened to him. In fact, if you lived in Middle Age Europe, you'd never have had a chance to find out what other cultures existed in other parts of the world. Their science, beliefs, foods and languages were simply unfathomable.

That's why something like the Fossett case is so difficult to accept - we expect every question to have an answer, if we just look hard enough. Even twenty years ago, a missing pilot probably would have been written off as "presumed dead". But with modern scanning and radar equipment, satellite imagery, Amazon Mechanical Turk, etc... we just refuse to accept anything less than certainty.

Will there ever be another Amelia Earhart? For that matter, how long until somebody pieces together what really happened to the Amelia Earhart?

I'm cheating on you.

Don't take it personally. My wit is simply too dynamic to be confined to a single blog. This morning, I decided to launch the Poor Packaging blog, where I'll document all those idiotic gaffes made by well-intentioned marketers. Yes, the notion that this new blog might help me find employment did cross my mind. But really, it's just for the fun of it.

I'll continue to post off-topic stuff here.

Happy weekend.

Wednesday, September 26, 2007

Why it pays to go to Shul.

From the AJC:

Celeb in synagogue

Congregation Beth Tefillah in Sandy Springs had a notable worshipper in the synagogue during Yom Kippur services on Saturday. Bob Dylan, in town for a show with Elvis Costello at Gwinnett Arena in Duluth, was quietly seated in the rear of the temple. According to Rabbi Yossi New, the iconic singer's people called in advance to ask if Dylan (who was born Robert Zimmerman) might join other attendees in observing the holiest holiday on the Jewish calendar.

The singer, donning a dark suit and head covering as is customary, took part in the service by doing a blessing over the Torah before quietly returning to his seat.

"He wanted to be treated just like any other congregant," explained New on Monday. "I'm very proud of the [congregation]. No one bothered him at all. He was allowed to pray like anyone else. His presence really highlighted that, in the eyes of God, we're all the same."

Former 99X "Morning X" co-host Jimmy Baron, a member of the Beth Tefillah congregation, found the experience "a little surreal." Said Baron: "A few people wished him 'Happy New Year' on the way out but otherwise he was just another guy there observing the holiday. I'm sure there were a few cases of neck strain."


Rabbi New was one of my teachers in middle school. Good move going to Chabad, Bobby - minimal chances of anyone taking a cell phone picture or asking for an autograph as might happen at some shuls. Glad to see that the kehillah behaved themselves.

I wonder what his Hebrew name is (for his aliyah callup).

HT to B-dot for finding this.

I hope his name is Pegasus

Although the cargo compartment probably isn't as prestigious as having your own wings.

Horse flown on transatlantic flight in dog crate

Thursday, September 20, 2007

Wasabi: Wassup with that?

I was munching on some wasabi-coated peanuts yesterday that I'd bought at the inimitable Wegman's, when I started to wonder how "hot" wasabi really is. Knowing that chili peppers are ranked for heat according to the Scoville Scale, I tried to discover where wasabi falls on the scale.

Alas, wasabi isn't typically ranked on the Scoville Scale. As wikipedia explains:
Its hotness is more akin to that of a hot mustard than the capsaicin in a chili pepper, producing vapors that irritate the nasal passages more than the tongue.

Reading further in the same wikipedia article, I found a shocking revelation: I'm not sure I've ever had wasabi!
Almost all sushi bars in America and Japan serve imitation (seiyō) wasabi because authentic wasabi is extremely expensive. Few people, even in Japan, realize that the wasabi that they consume is in fact an imitation. Although very hard to find, real wasabi powder (from Wasabia japonica plant) is a convenient way to experience true wasabi's remarkable flavor, but most commercially available "wasabi" powders contain no true wasabi at all. Most utilize a powdered imitation made from horseradish, mustard seed, and green food coloring (sometimes Spirulina). Whether real or imitation the powder is mixed with an equal amount of water to make a paste.

To distinguish between the true variety of wasabi and the imitation product, real wasabi is known in Japan as hon-wasabi (本山葵), meaning original, or true wasabi.

Have all of those Japanese restaurants been lying to us? I checked a tiny packet of wasabi leftover in our fridge from the last time we got take-out sushi (I think it came from Whole Foods) -- the first ingredient is "Japanese Horseradish", which implies that it's made with real wasabi. But I presume my nostril-burning peanuts are coated in something other than hon-wasabi, and I wonder how many times I've actually tasted the real thing in my sushi-eating experience.

Damn you, wikipedia! First you topple the conventional wisdom on peaches, and now this! Can't we go on in our blissful ignorance??

Wednesday, September 19, 2007

Car care 101

While we're on the subject of motoring, CNN Money has an excellent list of car care misconceptions.

Odd source for car care information, but these six tips are spot-on.

I especially like the tip about "letting your car warm up" before you drive. It's true that engines run their least efficiently when cold. But guess what? If your car is idling in the driveway, the engine will take about 10 minutes to warm up. If you just start driving immediately, it'll be warm in half that time. That means that your engine runs cold and inefficient for a much shorter period, saving a great deal of engine wear in the long-run. (Side note: if your engine is turbocharged, it may still be a good idea to let it idle for 30 seconds after driving before turning it off, to cool the turbo components.)

Mmmmm, trail rated

Chrysler Corp's new owners have shown a bold approach to marketing. From the people who brought you the lifetime powertrain warranty and the free car giveaway, the next great promotion:
Lick the chocolate off a Jeep.


No, that's not a hip new metaphor for some morally questionable activity (at least not yet). It's literal. Seven jeeps will be coated in chocolate, and the first to completely lick their assigned vehicle clean wins a 2008 Jeep Liberty.

The silliest part of this -- wait, let me rephrase -- one particularly silly aspect of this promotion is that the seven contestants will each be assigned different vehicles from the Jeep model lineup. My money is most definitely not on the guy who gets the Jeep Commander. [via autoblog]

Monday, September 17, 2007

A new talent

Check out the latest exploitation of our kid for your entertainment talent from The Boy.

Be sure to listen for Daddy's infamous schoolgirl giggle in the background, especially after the boisterous belch around 1:40.

Stacking the deck...

The following appears on a sticker, attached to the receipt from Rachel's recent oil change:
IMPORTANT
You may receive a customer satisfaction survey from Hyundai Motor of America in the next few weeks. If for any reason you cannot grade us "10" (completely satisfied) please contact [name withheld] at Fairfax Hyundai immediately. Your satisfaction is our No. 1 concern. Thank You. [phone # withheld]

This is just one example of a poorly-executed incentive program in the name of customer service. Clearly, the dealership gets some sort of incentive (cash or otherwise) from Hyundai of America if they achieve a certain overall score on their post-service customer surveys. (In marketing parlance, this survey would be called a Post-transaction assessment, or PTA.)

Many businesses try to solicit PTA data from customers, including the familiar note on your receipt from The Home Depot or Staples, prompting you to take a survey online or by phone. While many businesses provide an incentive to the customer to take these surveys, such as entry into a $5000 sweepstakes (or in the case of Fairfax Hyundai, coupons for free oil changes), an increasing number of businesses also provide an incentive to their branch locations to (1) encourage customers to take the survey and (2) achieve good performance on the survey based on customer feedback.

The problem, as if it weren't completely obvious, is that the Hyundai dealership's "No. 1 concern" is not your satisfaction, as stated on the sticker, but their own realization of an incentive from Hyundai of America. Read between the lines: the sticker is subtly suggesting that you fill out the survey only if you plan to grade them a "10" - otherwise, the implication is that you should call the dealership instead of filling out the survey. That way, they avoid having your survey results drag down their average.

How can you tell that their motivation is suspect? First of all, they ask you to call the service manager "if... you cannot grade us a '10'", not if you had a disappointing experience. Hello! Second, they are much more interested in your feedback via the survey data (as long as it's a 10) than in your real, honest opinion of their service. Otherwise, they'd put up a sign next to the cashier, stating:
If our service fell short of excellence in any way, our service manager would like to hear from you before you leave today.

The only thing more insulting than being on the receiving end of poor customer service is being taken for granted as a nameless contributor, helping people you don't know to earn an incentive they might not really deserve.

Tuesday, September 11, 2007

A video's worth a buncha words

Enjoy.


And L'shanah tovah tikatevu to those of you who understand that. To those who don't, happy September.

Friday, September 7, 2007

Conspiracy theories...

I don't fall for every conspiracy theory out there - for instance, I'm pretty confident that Oswald acted alone.

But when it comes to the disappearance of famed aviator Steve Fossett, consider me the leader of the tinfoil-hat crowd. He's been missing since Monday without a trace. His emergency beacon (set to become active after a crash) hasn't been detected, and nobody has heard from him despite having had aviation radios and a cell phone at the time of his fateful flight.

Here's my theory: He went out looking for dry lakebeds for his land-speed record attempt, as widely reported. But then he ventured a little too far to the south and got too close to the Nellis Air Force range, home of mysterious Area 51.

I'm not saying he was abducted by aliens or anything, but I'm sure that any unauthorized aircraft venturing too close to this area would be forced out of the air, either by military aircraft or more lethal means. This theory has been dismissed out-of-hand by several of the spokespeople for the search effort. But the restricted military range extends to within 130 miles of the Flying M Ranch, from where he took off. That's about an hour's flight in his Bellanca Super Decathlon.

If he did venture too close for the military's comfort, they probably forced his plane out of the sky - either getting him to land at the base, or more ominously, shot him down. Either way, the military could be biding its time and trying to figure out how to handle this major PR faux pas. Maybe they'll never reveal anything and just wait for the Civilian Air Patrol search to be called off...

(You heard it here first!)

Spaghetti and meatblocks

That's what we had for dinner last night. Well, rigatoni and meatblocks.

We had some frozen ground beef, and I decided to use it in pasta sauce without first defrosting it. Using a large chef's knife, I cut the frozen block into smaller blocks, added them to a pot full of tomato sauce, and let it simmer for almost an hour to make sure the meat not only defrosted but cooked too.

It wasn't terrible, but I don't recommend it. The meatblocks were very dense and didn't have much flavor. But if you're ever in a pinch, meatblocks can be used as a substitute for the more traditional meatballs.

Thursday, September 6, 2007

Unemployed! (Finally!)

This, dear reader, is the last entry I will type from the keyboard of my Compaq laptop. You see, it doesn't actually belong to me: it belongs to my former employer. And today is the day that "my employer" becomes "my former employer".

In an hour or so, I'll be in the office for a final time, to hand in my laptop, cell phone, and ID badge. No tearful goodbyes, no montage of cheesey memories from cubicle 940B. In fact, the thing I'll probably miss most is this very laptop computer, since I'll now be relegated to our desktop in the disaster of a room that we call our office. No more working in the sunroom on nice mornings; from now on I'll be emplanted in a sticky cheap leatherette desk chair. Maybe I'll buy one of those $500 fancy breathable mesh chairs. Oh, wait, unemployed. Right. So I should probably hold off on the big ticket items for a while.

There are several irons in the fire, so to speak. So hopefully the unemployment tag may not be around for long. I had better find a job soon, before I get too comfortable with the retired lifestyle.

Saturday, September 1, 2007

Overheard...

One of Blogger's "blogs of note" this week is Overheard Lines, where I found this gem:

Woman: "I'm a strict vegetarian! I don't eat anything that casts a shadow."
Friend: "So every other year you get to eat a groundhog?"

OVERHEARD BY JEFF


On an unrelated note, we had dinner tonight at a vegetarian restaurant. When we departed, we left the empty package from Seth's animal crackers on the table. Hope we didn't offend anybody.